Tag Archive | "Detroit Lions"

Top 10 Reasons to be a Detroit Piston


#10 You know ahead of time you can plan family vacations just before the Finals.

#9 You will never have the most technical fouls on the team. (Google ‘Rasheed Wallace’)

#8 You get to hang out at a Palace with a guy named Prince.

#7 Great chance of attending a victory parade next year . . . (Google ‘Red Wings’).

#6 If you don’t like a coach, relax, every few years you get a new one.

#5 Where else can you refuse a coaches order to go into a game and get away with it. (Google ‘Ben Wallace’)

#4 There are great housing deals.

#3 If you’re ever accused of under-achieving, you can divert the attention to the Lions and Tigers.

#2 There’s no pressure to perform-a coach drove through a Wendy’s naked and is still with the team. (Google idiot Lions Coach Joe Cullen busted for driving thru Wendys naked’)

#1 If you decide to look for another line of work, the Mayor’s position is open soon.

Copyright © 2008 – Sports Climax

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Bobby Layne “Curse” downing Lions?


MINNEAPOLIS – Legend has it that upon learning of his trade to Pittsburgh, Bobby Layne cursed the Detroit Lions by saying they “would not win for 50 years.” 

Turns out Bobby shortchanged himself.

Fifty years ended Monday. Six days later, the Lions played well enough to win but lost because of a phantom 42-yard pass interference penalty that set the Vikings up for the game-winning field goal in a 12-10 victory.

Somewhere, Bobby had to be chuckling at an 0-5 start for the team that has one playoff victory since The Curse began.

“You’ll get me in trouble talking about ‘The Curse,'” Lions receiver Roy Williams said. “You don’t want that to happen, do you? There is no curse.”

Williams was smiling like a man who thought otherwise. Like a man who got in trouble with management for telling the Detroit News a different story earlier in the week.

“I used to not be a believer in curses, but I’m a firm believer now,” Williams told the paper. “Bobby Layne, right? I didn’t know about it until I came here, but I’m learning, man. As the years go by, you see things happen with this football team that you just don’t see nowhere else.”

The difference in Sunday’s game was a safety with 18 seconds left in the first quarter. The stat sheet says Jared Allen sacked Dan Orlovsky for the safety.

That’s not entirely true. Allen was chasing him. But Orlovsky, making his first NFL start, accidentally ran out of the back of the end zone.

“I heard the whistle,” Orlovsky said. “I was like, ‘Did we false start? Was somebody offsides, or something?’ Then I looked down and was like, ‘You’re an idiot.'”

The Lions were the NFL’s dominant team of the 1950s. Layne became a legendary figure and a Pro Football Hall of Famer as the Lions won titles in 1952, 1953 and 1957. A slow start in 1958 led to the surprising trade on Oct. 6, 1958, and, well, the rest is painful history for Lions fans.

For most of Sunday’s game, the Lions were poised to bury The Curse with a spirited effort defensively (five sacks and three takeaways), a blocked field goal and a novice quarterback who was playing fairly well except for the safety.

In the end, however, bad things started happening to the Lions that have been happening to them since about Oct. 6, 1958. Two stood out in particular.

The first was a fumble by receiver Calvin Johnson with 12 minutes, 29 seconds left. It came at the end of a 32-yard pass to the Vikings 30-yard line. Replays appeared to indicate Johnson was down. The Lions challenged the call and lost. Naturally. They also lost Johnson for the rest of the game because of a head injury. Naturally.

The second whammy came with 2:15 left. Cornerback Leigh Bodden was playing great defense on receiver Aundrae Allison down the right sideline. Bodden made contact but should have been OK because he was playing the ball and looking back. The ball was incomplete, which should have set up a third-and-20.

Nope. Pass interference, according to field judge Mike Weir. According to referee Tony Corrente, “(Bodden) played through the back of the receiver.” First-and-10 at the Detroit 26.

Bodden was asked what happened.

“Nothing,” he said. “I talked to the official after. He said I ran up his back and didn’t look back for the ball. I looked back for the ball. I did everything right.

“We really deserved to win. But it just didn’t happen.”

Copyright © 2008 – Sports Climax

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No Removing Millen’s Stench from the Detroit Lions


DETROIT – The Detroit Lions are in one of the most unique situations ever seen in the NFL at this point of a season. Only four games into the season, they are desperate to make some moves but their hands are tied.

Owner William Ford, with the coaxing of his son, Junior, made a long overdue move after week three when he fired wannabe NFL exec, Matt Millen. Millen has packed up and is gone but like week-old fish, his stench remains.

That stench comes in the form of Coach Rod Marinelli and the athletes Millen has compiled over his historic record run of failure and there lies the unfixable problem.

After the 34-7 slaughter by their rival Chicago Bears at Ford Field on Sunday, Lions fans were reminded that nothing has or will change until yet another total overhaul is done.

Marinelli needs to go, there is absolutely no doubt about that, but no one on the Lions coaching staff is qualified or capable of stepping in for the remainder of the season. Do you feel that rope getting tighter on your hands, Mr. Ford?

Mike Martz, who’s San Francisco 49ers took it to the Lions in week three of the season, had head coaching and Super Bowl experience with the St. Louis Rams and could have moved up. But he, like many of the past Millen-hires have been fired and have moved on to greener pastures. Whether another NFL team, the broadcast booth or even the moon, most anywhere offers greener pastures than this Lions organization.

Marinelli and the Lions are stuck in a stressful situation that may last until the New Year. This is the NFL and the playbooks are complicated. (if you doubt that, take a look at Sunday’s lowlight of Roy Williams slanting in and Kitna throwing to the sideline.) Bringing in an entire new coaching staff simply cannot be done. When coaches get fired midseason, a current coaching staff member steps in.

Joe Barry, defensive coordinator and benefiter of Detroit’s nepotism program, has managed and created the worst defense in the NFL over the past two seasons. He’s not doing his job so obviously he cannot step up into his father-in-law’s position. (see our NFL section for “Lions Nepotism Article”)

Besides Millen, Barry may be the biggest cause of this year’s implosion. If he had half of a conscience, he would refuse his paycheck and step down.

Offensive coordinator, Joe Colletto is in the same boat as Barry, looks lost and incompetent and his squad has contributed greatly to the Lions 0-4 record, so who can this organization turn to? Line coach, Joe Cullen, the coach who was busted for driving through a Wendy’s naked?

The remainder of this season is not going to be any sort of roller-coaster ride for Lions fans, it’s going to be a steady nose-dive; all downhill from here, coasters have a few quick jaunts uphill.

There’s a great chance the Lions and their fans are stuck with Marinelli, but there’s always hope for a No. 1 overall pick and the good news is, this time it will not be Millen making it.

In the meantime, Lions fans should try their best to survive Millen’s leftover stench and this horrible coaching staff. Then they can begin next season with a new coaching staff, dozens of new players, a new GM and chant, “Maybe this is the year.”

Copyright © 2008 – Sports Climax

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NFL Week Five


Pitt at Jax – In a rematch of last year’s AFC wild-card game that the Jags won 31-29 in Pittsburgh, the Steelers will try to repay the favor and take it to the Jags in sunny Florida.That will be quite a challenge with a depleted running game and questionable ‘O’ line. Running backs Willie Parker is out with a knee and first-round draft pick Rashard Mendenhall is out for the season. The Jaguars sacked Big Ben six times and picked him off three in that 31-29 game. Things to watch for: Big Ben running for his life. The Jag cheerleaders who are some of the hottest in the league.

Oakland Bye Week – Since Raiders owner Al Davis fired Coach Lane Kiffin, the two are locked into a soap-opera style dispute over the remainder of Kiffen’s $3.5 million salary.

Davis referred to Kiffin as a “flat-out liar” and accused him of “disgracing the organization.” Kiffin responded by saying he was “hurt and saddened” by what he heard from Davis, saying he was “kind of embarrassed for Davis, to be honest with you.”

Davis is also accused of denying Kiffin the opportunity to say good-bye and hold a final meeting with his players. Things to watch for: Kiffin getting the money he’s owed and Davis continuing to make himself look like a senile old bastard.

Chicago at Detroit Chicago Bears defensive tackle Tommie Harris is suspended for today’s Norris Division match-up against the 0-3 Detroit Lions at Ford Field in Detroit. Harris was docked by the team for showing up late for rehab and a meeting earlier in the week. Harris, who sat out practice this week due to an injury wasn’t expected to play anyways.

Chicago players, Tillman, Vasher and Booker also did not practice most of the week due to injuries and it is unclear which of these players will be on the field against the cowardly Lions.

As Lions fans continue their raucous celebration of GM Matt Millen’s ouster to the tune of ‘Ding dong, the witch is dead’, could this be the upset of the week?

With Millen gone, Joe Barry, defensive coordinator and son-in-law of Coach Ron Marinelli, may begin to get more attention from lynch-mobbing Lions fans if his defense gives up another quick 21 points at the start of the game. Thing to watch for: Freshly painted “Fire Barry” Signs in the stands and ‘Fire Millen” T-shirts specials outside the stadium for 70% off.

Copyright © 2008 – Sports Climax

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NFL Owners Swinging the Axe Early


ST. LOUIS – Some NFL owners are making a very strong statement this year . . . win now or pack your bags. The first victim of the axe, which was five years overdue, was Detroit Lions GM Matt Millen.

During Week Three, Mike Martz and the San Fran 49ers threw a can a’ whoop-ass on Millen’s Lions. A few days later, with a little coaxing from his son, Bill Jr., Owner William Ford gave the dysfunctional Millen his walking papers.

For years, Millen put bad teams, followed by worse teams onto the field, drafting an assembly line of wide receivers and first-round flops.

Yesterday, the St. Louis Rams followed suit and fired their third-year coach, Scott Linehan. The Rams are the only team that may be worse than the Lions this year and after starting 0-4, Linehan got the axe.

Oakland Raiders Coach, Lane Kiffin is another coach that is sitting on a white-hot burner right now. Kiffin’s Raiders lost to the Chargers Sunday to drop to 1-3 putting his job in more jeopardy than last week. One of the hottest rumors around the league, prior to this loss, was that Kiffen was getting the boot from Owner Al Davis.

Payrolls and overhead have gotten out of hand and owners have such huge investments in their organizations, they expect a return. With a short 16 game season, a slow start out the gate can put these owner’s “investments” in an improbable position for finding success.

With Kiffin hanging on by a thread and other coaches like Marvin Lewis, Rod Marinelli and Romeno Crennell struggling to put a team on the field that even remotely resembles an NFL squad, expect a few more coaches to be ducking the axe early in this NFL season.

Copyright © 2008 – Sports Climax

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The Brain Cell Shortage in Pro Sports


After this past week, you have to be convinced that professional sports in America are operating with a shortage of brain cells after Dallas Maverick, Josh Howard, made his way back into the national media, going out in public without his common sense.

While attending a charity football game earlier this summer, Howard decided to snag an additional 15 minutes of fame and delivered his controversial comment to a nearby video camera. “The Stars Spangled Banner is going on right now; I don’t even celebrate that shit, I’m black.”

First of all, it is Howard’s right to not celebrate Francis Scott Key’s tune if he chooses, this is America, but he should not imply that every other African-American in this country does not.

Howard’s comments are worthy of the onslaught of negative publicity that is swallowing him up right now. This isn’t the first time the NBA star has made the headlines.

He’s admitted smoking dope and after these comments surfaced, he definitely inhales. Only a severe shortage of brain cells could cause someone of his stature to use such idiotic judgment.

Since we’re on the topic of poor decision-making, Matt Millen must have been envious of the attention given to Howard over the past few days. He crawled out of his hole and came out from hiding to meet with the Detroit media to talk about his 0-2 Detroit Lions.

Millen who looks emotionally drained and homeless half the time, for good reason, has become an expert of being incognito to the media. This week he faced the music and answered a few football related questions.

As reported in The Detroit Free Press, when asked about his 0-2 Lions and their record-setting string of losses under his management, he responded, “What we are doing is the right thing to do . . . stay the course.”

This incompetent exec, who should be arrested every time he cashes his check, confirmed he is happy with “the course” his 0-2 Lions are on. If a team is 0-2 and stays on that course, as the Lions are very capable of doing, they will then end up at 0-16. Is that “the right thing to do.”

Sounds like Millen is also inhaling . . . outdoing Howard in bong hits at a 3-1 ratio.

When people Millen and Howard display their inability to think, we end up forgetting about dumb-ass comments like the one made by Mike Shanahan after NFL referee Ed Hochuli made one of the shittiest calls of his career and handed a victory to the Broncos that clearly should have been won by the San Diego Chargers.

Shanahan, somehow wearing a straight face, addressed the media after that game and had the audacity to say, “That’s the best crew we’ve had in the last 20 crews. They did a heck of a job.”

You are full of bullshit, Mike. And so is Matt Millen. Josh Howard on the other hand was just plain stupid to make that ‘home video’.

Be sure to vote on our home page for one of these three morons. We will crown one of them with the “Dumb-Ass-Quote-of-the-Week”.

Copyright © 2008 – Sports Climax

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Bitch-Slap-of-the-Week – Lions Matt Millen


After being fired by the Detroit Lions at the end of last season, offensive whiz-kid Mike Martz, now with the San Francisco 49ers, repaid the favor, took the Lions to school 31-13 and bitch-slapped GM Matt Millen right out of a job, sending the record-setting exec straight to the unemployment line just three weeks into the 2008 NFL season.  

Making the best of the opportunity, Martz showed Millen why he should not have been the scapegoat, the Scooter Libby for the Lions after their 1-7 season-ending nose-dive last year that put them out of the playoffs.

While setting personal records of futility, Millen has become an expert at firing coaches and pointing the finger in every direction but his own.

Martz must have been salivating at this opportunity to embarrass his former team the Lions who dropped their league-worst record to 0-3.

The game was a cakewalk for quarterback J.T. O’Sullivan, RB Frank Gore and the rest of the offense. The offensive line dominated Millen’s Lions and J.T. was not sacked in 23 pass attempts, something that is very rare in a Martz offense.

The biggest challenge for Martz was hiding the shit-eating grin on his face every time his Niners high-stepped into the Lions end zone.

Millen said in an earlier interview last week that his Lions are “Doing the right thing” and need to “Stay the course”.

The Lions did the right thing the day they gave Millen his long overdue pink slip and send the incompetent GM packing and we are doing the right thing by giving you, Mr. Millen, our hands-down Bitch-Slap-of-the-Week.

Copyright ©2008 Sports Climax

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NFL Week 3 – Zebras, Cheeseheads & Mike Martz


Detroit vs. Mike Martz – The Lions make a trip to the west coast to play the San Francisco 49ers and face offensive guru, Mike Martz, who was fired by the Lions last season. Seems like every week somebody has a career day against the Lions who again boast one of the worst defenses in the NFL.

Expect Martz to unleash a smorgasbord of big plays and unmercifully run up the score against Lions defensive coordinator, Joe Barry’s group. This week, JT O’Sullivan may suddenly look like a seasoned NFL quarterback. The biggest challenge for Martz will be removing the shit-eating grin on his face every time his offense scores another TD. Thing to watch for: Mike Martz hiding the smirk on his face with his clipboard throughout this blowout and struggling not to gloat during his post-game press conference.

Dallas at Green Bay – These two teams, who both started 10-1, were expected to meet in the NFC Championship game last year, until they ran into the overachieving Giants.

In the nationally televised SNF game, the Farve-less Packers have an opportunity to show the world they are for real and what better way to do that than to beat Tony Romo’s Cowboys. Should be an entertaining game featuring two young QB’s who love standing back and heaving bombs. Things to watch for: A record number of those stupid-ass looking cheese headgears in the sold-out crowd.

NFL Referees – After Ed Hochuli’s controversial game-stealing call against the San Deigo Chargers last week, eyes will be on the NFL’s whistle-blowers like never before. The media pounded that one into the dirt, exposure the league prefers to avoid. Expect more zebra huddles throughout the games this week on any plays even remotely questionable. Things to watch for: Head-scrathing, ass-pickin’, dumbfounded looks . . . the usual things that occur in zebra huddles.

Cincinnati at NY Giants – The champion NY Giants and their 2-0 record seem to be on cruise-control through the first few weeks of the season. It’s almost do-or-die time for the Bengals who cannot afford a 0-3 start. The Bengals have struggled offensively, scoring a mere 17 points over the first two games.

Buffalo’s punter, Brian Moorman has more TD passes than Carson Palmer, who has averaged two TD passes a game throughout his career and not yet connected for one this season. Things to watch for: A lot of high-fives and chest-banging from the NY Giants ‘D’ while they feast on Palmer and the Bengals struggling offense. Palmer trying to surpass punter Moorman on the stats sheet.

Copyright © 2008 – Sports Climax

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Detroit Lions Circus In National Spotlight


DETROIT – The Detroit Lions season is still days away and they are already finding ways into the national spotlight. ESPN, the NFL Network and media outlets around the country are having a field day with this one.

Lions running back Tatum Bell’s bag-snatching fiasco this week at the Lions facility was recorded on security surveillance cameras. In case you’re living in a cave and missed it, Bell is accused of, and was videotaped, stealing Rudi Johnson’s Gucci bag from the locker room.

In an interview with The Detroit Free Press on Wednesday, Johnson insisted that Tatum stole his stuff; “All this happened once he got released. He came here to get some stuff out of his locker. That’s when he scooped the bags up. Some real shyster, conniving stuff, man.”

Tatum who was cut by the Lions to make room for Johnson said he thought the bags belonged to another released Lion player who was also sent packing that same day and that he was asked to pick up the bags.

First of all girls, stop fighting amongst yourselves and what the hell is a grown, macho-type guy like Johnson, doing with a Gucci bag to begin with.

So here we are before the season’s first Lion fumble in the red zone and the Lions have already found a way to look like a bonehead organization. Reminisent of when Roy Williams refused to tip a pizza delivery guy, like when Coach Marty Morningway won a coin toss in overtime but gave the ball to the home team Chicago Bears who marched down the field and won.

What are the real facts surrounding this snatch-and-grab circus?

Who cares!?

It’s time to put on the pads in Atlanta and try to win this Sunday’s opening game, a battle many believe a showdown between the two sorriest francises in the NFL.

It’s time to lace ’em up and play some NFL football!

There lies the problem. The Lions normally are not capable of playing NFL football. There record over the last several years under Matt Millen proves that. And where is Matt while all this bickering and embarrassment surrounds his Lion’s team?

I haven’t seen Millen comment on this yet. Maybe he’s still walking around looking like a homeless drunk. Millen looks like a guy who’s in the witness protection program lately, in disguise . . . incognito. He may be tired of being recognized in public by ticked off Lions fans.

Tatum has reason to be pissed off at the Detroit Lions organization for destroying his career but he doesn’t have the right to steal another player’s belongings in retaliation.

Tatum is a guy who had rushed for over 1,000 yards prior to coming to Motown and was promised playing time which he rarely saw. When he asked to be traded, the Lions benched him for the remaining games of that season, ruining his chances to pursue a contract during the following free agency period.

Bell, like many other star-caliber players and coaches made the mistake of coming to Detroit then were stuck in a situation that ripped their careers apart at the seams. (Google Marcus Pollard, Damian Woody and Steve Mariucci)

That’s another whole issue and article in itself but getting back to week one for 2008 let’s ask the Lions; can you somehow stop finding ways to embarrass yourselves?

It’s difficult enough for the football fans of Detroit to stay loyal to an NFL organization that remains in our near the cellar in their division year after year; never lives up to their promises and preaches character to their players while giving one of their coaches a little slap on the wrist after he was arrested and charged for driving through a Wendy’s drive-thru naked? (Google Lions Joe Cullen)

Are you ready for some Lions football!

Copyright © 2008 – Sports Climax

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