Goodell, NFLPA leader shift focus to their annual salaries

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has agreed to accept a $1 annual salary in the event there is a lockout with the NFL players this upcoming season. That salary would place the commissioner well above several retired NFL players who had either retired after three years of service or are in the red each year from skyrocketing injury rehab costs.

When asked where the remaining $9,999,999 of his salary was going, the commissioner responded, “It’ll be added to my bonus whenever the players get back to work, what a bonehead question.”

While the union and league continue to hammer things out, New York Jets cornerback Antonio Cromartie took it upon himself to become the unofficial spokesman for the union and stepped up to try to smooth things out saying:

“You got our head union rep acting like an asshole. They got their guys acting like a-holes. So they just need to get their shit together and just get it done.”

When told about the comment from Cromartie, Goodell responded by sticking his tongue out.

Referring to Cromartie’s comments, NFLPA executive director DeMaurice Smith said he would prefer for Cromartie to step down from the microphone and allow more respected players like Albert Haynesworth and retired Giants player Lawrence Taylor to handle the P.R. duties from here on out.

Concerning his

We will keep you abreast to the lack of progress in these negotiations as more news becomes available.

This is a sports parody piece and is used with permission of the author.

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